Post-breakdown post

Ok, now that the dust has settled I have words to express what I was going through last week. I was exhausted, and I felt like I was failing at everything. On Thursday - I finally broke down in tears with Chad and told him my account of my current failures: work, school, unpacking, being a good wife, and generally sleeping a lot.

Chad is amazing. He sat and prayed with me, let me cry and encouraged me by doing quite a few things around the house that I had claimed were my responsability. He told me in all honesty - his job has changed if he wants to be a daddy. He has to take up more slack at home and he wants me to rest. I want so badly to be content with that. Since Thursday, that is what I have tried to do - be content with his help, and be more open with my needs.

It helped to talk to my Mom a little that night too. She was just home from getting shots (maybe a laser treatment?) on her legs at the hospital. She has bad vericose veins, so this is an ongoing treatment she has to do. She felt awful too. We got a chance to pray together - that helped.

My mantra recently has been:
God is who He says He is
I can do what God says I can do*
I am who God says I am
Therefore, I trust Him.

something like that. The last line is always the same. Sometimes I say God can do what He says He can do, or God is going ahead of me or something like that. Regardless, it has helped me to relax a little more and take some of the burden off of myself.

Today (Monday) I am feeling better. I was in the office today, and it was nice to see everyone. They are very encouraging.

Thursday we find out if they are boys, girls. or a combo pack. The other night I had a dream that I gave birth to 4 girls. The doctors said, "oops".

dreams are a funny thing.

Love y'all.
Marie A.